The Ultimate List Of Parenting Skills That Will Make You An Effective Parent
The most difficult job on the planet is definitely parenting. People try their best, but they still miss out a few areas in the parenting domain that is why I have made a skill set which will significantly positively affect your parenting and will bring you closer to your children.
This is the 21st century, and it’s no surprise that a woman can be a mother as well as a working lady. But the biggest challenge that women particularly young mothers face is “how to flawlessly balance between their home, that is, their children and their work” You could be a career mummy, a part-time working mummy or a mummy working from home – the right equation is essential for each of them. Yes, we welcome you to the place where you will learn about all the parenting skills you need.
Being a full-time/Part-time working parent can lead to a lot of feelings such as guilt and stress because of the attention that is divided between work and family. The key here is to focus on a plan, to get organized, and find the perfect balance between profession and parenthood. Here are 9 skills that will help make sure both your career and your family flourish.
The term ‘opportunity cost’ is never more relevant than to a working parent. If you decide to stay at home, the opportunity cost is, of course, less money. If you choose to go to work, the opportunity cost is probably less time with your kids, but here the opportunity benefits are more money, more freedom and better financial prospects for your family.
Start off by finding what's best for you and your family – perhaps part-time is sufficient or maybe full-time is the thing for you. Think about how you feel satisfied as an individual: full-time motherhood or full-time working isn’t suitable for everyone. You may need to try a few different options before you exactly know what you’re comfortable with.
Involve your spouse
Sure it feels great to be a supermom and do everything yourself for your little bundle of joy, but if you stay on the same track for long, you’re likely to end up doing all the work yourself. To be precise, do not forget to get your husband in on the game and the most useful thing you can do for yourself is to get your baby's father involved right from the start in the care and feeding.
If your husband is brave enough to shoulder some of the burdens of those middle-of-the-night wake-up calls, then let him take care of it, you'll be in better shape when you have to perform at work tomorrow, this may not solve the problem entirely, but it helps.
Try talking to your husband and explain him the troubles you go through as you look after the office and the baby all by yourself. Together you need to get systems in place to guarantee the smooth running of a household – it may not look spotless, but it will be happy, and you and your partner will feel pride for contributing every little now and then to the way it runs.
Line up childcare early
Good, reliable childcare is a must. Start surveying daycare centers and interviewing nannies well before you start working. This helps in developing confidence and trust in your childcare provider as it will definitely make those first days a little easier.
I recommend hiring nannies with a track record of long-term commitments to families. This shows they are highly experienced and are adaptable to various age groups, from the delicate caring of newborns to helping older children with their homework, a good nanny should have it all covered.
I also encourage families to plan a paid playdate with the candidates, because "this playdate (approx two to four hours) allows the family to assess how the nanny interacts with the child in a less formal surrounding." Extensive experience, excellent references, and a record to prove it are essential for a good childcare provider plus a good daycare facility should have flexible hours, a low teacher-to-student ratio, outdoor area, valid licenses, and employees with transparent backgrounds.
Stay Connected During the Day
Stay connected with your baby/children even when you're not together. For parents with younger kids, try recording yourself talking or singing on a video, or you can record your voice reading along to a children's story.
If unfortunately, you're going to miss or be late to an older child's occasion, give them something special in the morning, like a little good-luck charm or a personal handwritten note.
Try to look into options for filming the entire event so you can watch it later and not miss a moment, hang out pictures of yourself and your partner so the kids can see your faces every once a while. During your breaks at work, call your child; hearing them can ease you up a rough day, and they’ll be comforted to know that you're near.
Limit Time Wasters and distractions
Be disciplined and set up proper time limits when checking email or making phone calls, all the things you can do when the kids are sleeping. Reduce TV watching to a minimum say once a week to maximize time with your partner during the evenings. Avoid multitasking, especially when you are spending time with your children as this could turn out disastrous, leaving your kids and you unhappy. At your workplace, try to avoid wasting time. But Of course you want to have a rapport with co-workers, but continuous email exchanges, long Internet surfing, gossiping, and big lunches are obvious distractions that will make you less productive. Focus primarily on your tasks at work and try to keep the chit chat during breaks or lunchtime.
Create Moments for Yourself
After managing your time wisely, you can fit in precious "me" time regularly. A refreshing break will definitely help you recharge while taking care of personal needs, how? "Because your entire time is divided between your home and your career, be sure to manage your energy well. You can't be an effective spouse or parent if you're cranky all the time. So take some time out to care for yourself to feel relaxed and effective", try out things that really comforts you, like Lose yourself in a book before you go to sleep, or take a bubble bath once a week, treat yourself to a day at the spa. Fit in some time for exercise (a yoga class maybe) or focus on a hobby that brings you joy. Most importantly remember to eat well and get plenty of rest -- simple things that even the smartest moms neglect.
Create Special Family Activities
Making time for your baby/kids is paramount, both during the week and on the weekends, to nurture your family actively and allow everyone to bond. If you're having troubles dedicated entire days, have a family breakfast or a family fun night with board games or movies. "Create such activities that regularly fit into your schedule so that everyone knows what to expect from you and what to look forward to,"
An important reminder; When you do have family outings, please avoid talking about work or checking your phone as this may have an unpleasant effect on your child. Instead, focus on your kids and their interests such as friends, classes, and hobbies. With older children, you can ask for their activity suggestions as well try to meet their needs. In the end, it doesn't really matter what you do as long as you’re having fun and doing it together.
Accept that you can't have it all
Making this your mantra will help you cope up for sure “The Super man is dead. Long live the Real man.” The days when people had it all and did it all are long gone. Get real people, It takes time, but the sooner you settle with the fact that you can’t have it all, the better. And the less you think on what you don’t have will result in more energy you will have to pour into the fruits of your labour – your precious children.
“If you are walking, breathing and have your five senses working, you have it all. Everything else comes in second. Life is what you make of it so stop whining and worrying about what you don’t have and make the best of what you have.”
Let go of the guilt
Working people already have enough on their plates without a sweet big side-serve of guilt to go with it. What I recommend is to allow yourself to be upset and angry that you just can’t take forever off from work with your child. It has been only this generation where the expectation and financial requirement has been so upscale that mothers return to work so early; but that certainly doesn’t mean that generations of love and emotions where nature bounds us physically to our children disappears. Always remember you are returning to work so that you can provide a good future for your child.”
Feeling guilty about working, then feeling guilty about not working and contributing to the family and after that feeling guilty about not making enough homemade dinners ends up feeling guilty about enjoying 'me time' – STOP IT RIGHT NOW! This kind of thinking is a waste of energy – energy that you could use more productively. So turn those thoughts around and that frown upside down, You have chosen to work for a reason, you are choosing to spend time with your children for a reason, you are choosing 'me time' for a reason – let the guilt go, it won’t do you any good, trust me.
Those were the 9 golden ways to make your parenting life as a professional life a little less hectic as it normally is, besides that Your baby's a keeper, but the chaos and heartbreak you go through won't be. As just about any working mom will tell you, the first month is definitely the most challenging. In the process you learn that you don't physically have to be with your child every minute for them to feel loved or to have a great day. Once you get into a groove, you can take pride in being the multifaceted parent you’ve become -- a hardworking professional and a loving, caring, engaged parent.
Top 10 Parenting tips
GET CLOSE TO YOUR CHILD: Give your child lots of physical affection – children often like hugs, cuddles and holding hands
REALIZE YOUR PRIORITY: When your child wants to show you something, stop what you are doing and pay attention to them. it is important to spend frequent, small amounts of time with your child doing things that you both enjoy.
TALK TO THEM: Talk to your child about things they are interested in and share parts of your day with them.
APPRECIATE THEM: Give your child lots of descriptive praise when they do something that you would like to see more of, “Thank you for doing what I asked right away!”
KEEP THE FUN GOING: Children are more likely to misbehave when they are bored so provide lots of engaging indoor and outdoor activities for them, like coloring and dress up.
TEACHING STARTS FROM HOME: Teach your child new things and skills by first showing it yourself how it is done, this won’t only encourage your child, but it will also give him opportunities to learn new skills. For example, speak politely and softly to each other. Prompt them to use manners like “please” or “thank you,” and praise them when they do.
MAKE RULES: Set clear limits on your child’s behavior. Sit down and have a discussion on the norms of the home. Let your child know what the consequences will be if they break the rules.
TAKE ACTIONS IF NECESSARY: If your child misbehaves, stay calm and give them clear instruction to stop and tell them what you would like them to do instead. Praise them if they stop. If they do not listen, follow through with an appropriate consequence.
STAY CALM DURING TOUGH TIMES: Have realistic expectations. All children at times misbehave, and it is inevitable that you will have some discipline challenges. Trying to be the perfect parent can set you up for frustration and disappointment.
Wrapping it up
In the end, I would just like to sum up the article by saying that your children should be your primary concern, it is their upbringing that will represent you, that either you were a good parent or a bad one. You don’t need to take classes for this, all you need to do is take some time out from your daily schedule and reserve it for the kids. Just a bit a love and care can do miracles.
Hi everyone! My name is Kristi Cathey and I’m glad you found your way to my blog. I am a mother of 3 beautiful angels. This blog was created in order to share my personal experiences in baby care and general health care for pregnant women. If you'd like to get in touch with me, please contact me by sending me an email via firstname.lastname@example.org. Welcome to Intelligentmother.com